Thriving in Retirement: Health, Identity, and Relationships

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Hello and welcome to this month’s episode of Zevo Talks. My name is Sarah Keene, Wellbeing Consultant with Zevo Health, and today I’ll be exploring some of the ways that we can improve the transition to retirement.

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This is a subject that more often than not generally tends to revolve around money matters. When it comes to the word retirement, many of us may automatically think about pensions and financial planning, and maybe, of course, the luxury of having more free time to ourselves.

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And yet, while on the surface, all of these extra freedoms may seem enticing, research indicates that this transition can be very challenging for some people. Other very important factors that profoundly influence our health and wellbeing can be impacted during this major life transition.

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So the intention of this short soundbite today is just to prompt consideration of some of these elements that can so easily be overlooked or taken for granted when it comes to future planning as we age.

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We have an upcoming masterclass on our app that will take a deeper dive into the key areas that we touch upon today, but otherwise, really, this is just about planting some seeds for thought. We’ll briefly cover some of the current research on longevity and life quality, from fundamental shifts that occur with regards to identity and purpose, to changing relational dynamics, and then, of course, ways that we can preserve and enhance our general health as we age.

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So if you or someone close to you is preparing to retire, this may be worth a listen. So whether you’re listening today because you’re preparing for retirement yourself, or maybe someone you know is, or maybe you’re just curious in general on this topic, I’m delighted that you’re here to consider an aspect of our work life that so often is taken for granted and not given much conscious planning beyond the financial aspects.

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So where are we gonna start? Really, I guess the first thing is to recognize that like everything in our world at the moment, retirement has changed significantly in recent decades, and in some ways, radically so.

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Interestingly, when retirement was first introduced globally over a century ago, the average life expectancy was significantly shorter than it is today. And despite life expectancy extending up to 20 years longer in some parts of the world, retirement age has remained relatively static.

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As a result, this means that these days, people can expect to be retired for anywhere up to 30 years or so, which can constitute almost a third of their entire lifespan. That said, research carried out by the Irish Longitudinal Study on Aging, or TILDA for short, found that retirement doesn’t really necessarily come as standard.

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While retirement conventionally seems to be framed as an age-related event, in truth, it’s a much more complex process that can happen at different ages for different reasons and in different contexts.

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In fact, less than 50% of retirement is due to reaching the eligible age for state pension. So as you can imagine, the process of retiring can look very different for individuals depending on their specific circumstances.

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And so some of the points we touch on today may be more pertinent than others for you. However, they’re all relevant to some degree, irrespective of our circumstances. These factors may be especially relevant to anyone who has worked in formal employment for much of their adult life, and really dealing with the impact of this life change that can come about when long-held familiar routine and structure comes to a halt.

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In 2019, a survey conducted by the Society of Actuaries of over 1,000 retirees found that approximately 33% of respondents found the transition unexpectedly challenging, while about 40% reported that it was not challenging at all.

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That said, almost 50% of respondents found that it took more than two years to adjust to the life change, whereas about a quarter found that they adjusted within a year. And so on these grounds, like all things, the premise of this exploration today is just really to appreciate that while there can be a vast difference in our individual experiences, there are still many ways that we can proactively enhance the transition across the board.

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On a highly positive note, 50% of the respondents in the same survey reported being happier after retirement. This reaffirms findings on the U-shaped happiness curve, which you may be familiar with. If not, this research asserts that people’s happiness generally follows a trend of peaking in early life, dipping to its lowest point in their mid-40s, and then increasing again as people become much happier in the later decades of life.

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This research was originally conducted by happiness economist Richard Easterlin way back in the 60s, as he explored the relationship between happiness and income. While this original study has prompted many more researchers to delve, the caveat is that this really is just a general pattern rather than an absolute rule.

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But it does make a lot of sense. For many people, midlife can come with added pressures relating to career progression, raising a family, looking after elderly parents. And in older adulthood, many of these additional stressors tend to dissipate for many people.

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Also, age is often associated with greater wisdom and enhanced emotional self-regulation, which of course plays a huge part in happiness and wellbeing. That’s at least according to Professor Laura Carstensen in the Stanford Center on Longevity.

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But in other words, your best years are likely to be out of you, irrespective of your age, and contrary to what we might otherwise tend to believe. In recent times, we’re also learning much more about the difference between chronological and biological age.

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The field of research on epigenetics has shed great light on just how much of our gene expression is impacted by our daily lifestyle choices, our environment and social connection, and plays a huge part when it comes to healthy aging and longevity.

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But there’s so much within our control and within our power to direct when it comes to our physical health and wellbeing. And that’s exactly what this podcast is about. When an individual stops working, they can get back approximately 50 hours a week of their time.

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However, they can lose up to 80% of their social interaction. And again, while this is just a rule of thumb figure, and it very much depends on your type of work and role, it is a common trend. And so retirement can present the challenge of really what to do with all that extra time, as well as how to compensate for all that lost engagement with others.

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In another recent survey, again in 2019, respondents were asked, what does good retirement look like? The answers were interesting. Beyond financial comfort and financial security, people reported that other essential components of a happy retirement included good health, spending more time enjoying hobbies, more time with their family, and having a strong overall sense of purpose and continual personal growth.

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So we’re gonna unpack these a little. Firstly, like briefly touching on general health. Many of us are likely familiar with the saying, our health is our wealth. And this is certainly never truer as we enter into these latter decades of life.

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Gal Wettstein is a senior research economist in the Center for Retirement Research in Boston. And he says our health should be just as significant a factor when we’re considering retirement as anything else.

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He believes that as our lifespan increases as it has, it’s really important for us also to focus on enhancing and increasing our health span. This is a term he defines as the number of years that we can expect to remain healthy and disability free.

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Because unfortunately, despite our lifespans extending at a great rate, it hasn’t necessarily been paralleled by a comparative increase in our health spans. And we’ve seen a wide prevalence of chronic health issues, sometimes referred to as non-communicable diseases.

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Many of these are preventable through lifestyle changes. In a study he carried out in 2021, he found that Americans who were healthy at 50 could expect to live 23 more years disability free, up to an average age of about 73.

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And while of course, this is just a statistical calculation, it does point to this rise of what’s been called the welderly. These are individuals who do stay fit and healthy into these latter decades of life.

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And cheesy and all as it may sound, it’s highly relevant. These chronic health issues that arise in latter decades can very quickly extinguish the excitement and spark of retirement due to the limitations they impose.

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So when planning for retirement, all the standard pillars to optimize health are relevant to consider, especially those that so directly impact on our health and wellbeing and have such vast, robust research behind them.

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So from nutrition and dietary behaviour, to physical activity and weaving in organic movement regularly throughout our days, to tackling your sleep behaviours and really addressing whether you’re priming yourself for better quality sleep, or indeed if you may have behaviours and habits or attitudes that detract from that, as well as also cultivating greater mind-body connection and being more aware of your state of being and managing stress more effectively.

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Each of these areas has been researched extensively over the last number of decades. And so there’s mounting evidence that support well-established guidelines that can perhaps direct you in how you can enhance your behaviours in the respective areas, if this has been something that maybe you’ve been neglecting.

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And certainly retirement presents this prime opportunity to have more scope and capacity to give attention to these things that maybe you neglected in the past. In addition to this, health checks and regular screening is also advised in latter years in order to really catch any chronic illness in its tracks as early as possible.

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So this is also something to be aware of and to maybe liaise with your healthcare provider about. Just serving as a gentle reminder as something to factor in to the retirement planning process. So some of the less direct or certainly apparently direct impacts on our health and well-being are things like this sense of identity and having clarity around your values and purpose in life.

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So how we see ourselves and what gives us a sense of meaning. So from the time we’re young, the message that our work plays a central role in our lives and is even a defining component of who we are and our value in the world has been unconsciously reinforced over and over again.

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Whether it’s from well-intentioned adults asking the question, so what do you want to do when you grow up? To school teachers who may be hammered in the importance of studying as hard as your future dependent on it.

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To pass away comments at casual dinner parties, so tell me what do you do for a living. For most adults, the defining role of work and career has been emphasized for much of our lives. Well fortunately in recent decades this is lessening and we’re seeing the emergence of greater self-awareness paired with the rapid evolution of work models and the rise of the gig economy.

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People’s horizons are expanding rapidly and that whole paradigm is truly being disrupted. However for older generations such as baby boomers and gen x, that association between work and personal value can still be deeply embedded and can be a tricky one to shake.

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This can make retirement a challenge in many ways. This may be even more pertinent for individuals who may have been bound to a vocation for their entire working life or worked in the same company or even the same position for 40 years or more.

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It’s easy to see how identity can become enmeshed in what we do for a living and how our main roles can be unconsciously adopted as an extension of ourselves which means that retirement for some can symbolize a figurative death and in tow a person can really experience a deep sense of grief and loss.

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Work and career provide a sense of purpose and direction. There’s a sense of accomplishment and achievement and also this huge avenue for social connection and so a significant shift in our daily routines and interactions can further compound this sense of loss and fuel confusion and create almost a void in our daily lives.

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Without conscious awareness of this phenomenon it’s very easy to run into trouble. So coping with this loss of identity at retirement really involves a process of self-reflection, continual adjustment and an exploration of new roles, new interests and new sources of fulfillment.

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This requires redefining a sense of self and a purpose beyond the professional realm, finding new avenues for personal growth, connection and contribution. So fortunately on the other side of this figurative death really does lie the opportunity for a rebirth and reinvention.

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It’s also worth noting that we’re now living in a world of limitless opportunity. Retirement is no longer synonymous with not working. There are so many ways to not only continue contributing to our communities and local groups but also continuing to generate income in innovative ways and supplement retirement funds.

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So retiring from formal employment no longer necessarily equates to no longer generating income. According to the TILDA report that I mentioned earlier 13% of retirees continue to work after their retirement, typically in temporary or occasional positions but for an average of up to 23 hours a week.

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This comment from a research participant sums up the sentiment that many share. Most of us don’t see ourselves hanging up our boots and heading for the golf course. We want to continue being productive and engaged.

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This means we should be designing the next phase of our life so that we retain our sense of purpose and control over our lives into the future.

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Zevo is a fully integrated workplace well-being provider. We understand that every company has different goals, needs and characteristics. Our team of psychologists, performance nutritionists and experts in the field of physical health conduct in-depth research and thereafter develop and tailor strategic corporate well-being programs based on the outcome for each organization.

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Our health and well-being technology helps take the pulse of your employees’ well-being needs and promote positive engagement in your organization’s well-being programs. Encouraging them to move, nourish and inspire our broad range of services available both online and on-site are designed to improve employees’ overall well-being and increase engagement within the workplace.

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We aim to create the healthiest workplace across the globe to ensure that your most important assets, your employees are energized and thriving. Contact us today to start your workplace well-being journey at www.zevohealth.com.

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that sums it up nicely. And so a great way to begin delving into the potential impact of the transition upon you is really to engage in some form of reflective practice, whether that’s alone through things like journaling, meditation and self-inquiry or with others in some form of group work or with a facilitator or a coach.

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Reflection is a bedrock of self-awareness and self-awareness in turn is the doorway to greater freedom. The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron is a course that’s an example of a guided process designed to unveil your personal values and interests and it’s an example of something that can be done alone or equally with a group or as part of a more structured course.

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However you find that way and time to reflect, giving attention to consider things like your personal strengths, your skills, your preferences and your dreams can really open up that channel of creativity and imagination and this can be profoundly enriching and a very supportive practice as a huge part of one’s life is lost.

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But most importantly reflecting on these things can really signpost and highlight what matters most to you in life. Now some people may be very well versed and well practiced on this whole concept of exploring your values but for other listeners today maybe it’s relatively new so I’m just briefly going to explain that values are in essence these core beliefs and principles that guide your thoughts and choices and behaviours.

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Our values shape our identity and play a key role in defining who we are as individuals however we may be aware of our values in varying degrees so some values are very clear and apparent such as maybe your care for the welfare of those you love but other values may be subtle and less conscious yet may still be profoundly influencing how you live your life.

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Our values can stem from cultural norms and conditioning but also from intrinsic factors like your inherent traits. Some people can feel very hardwired as though your values are just an inherent part of who you are whereas other values may be more fluid and susceptible to change.

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In retirement it can become more relevant than ever to reflect on your values and increase awareness of what you find meaningful. You can also reflect on things that you’re grateful for and that you appreciate as well as being more aware and conscious of your personal triggers and your state of being and the reactions that arise throughout your day.

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As I mentioned a moment ago reflection fosters greater self-awareness which in turn breeds liberation from old habitual ways of thinking of being and charts a new course that can be much more enlivening and exciting.

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It’s important to recognise that values and meaning as well as self-discovery and identity is an ongoing dynamic process. As such it’s important to find a way of enjoying it. So some of the reflective practices mentioned a few moments ago may reveal themes or topics and whether you prefer self-inquiry through journaling or supported inquiry through facilitation, coaching, therapy or just general stimulating conversation with like-minded friends.

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However you decide to approach it it can be uniquely your own process. Now if none of that appeals to you, another approach is maybe just to simply look at your bank statement. This often tends to be a solid breadcrumb trail to what you value most.

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Just consider what you spend your money on and it will quickly highlight what you consider to be very important, especially when it comes to your discretionary spending. Whatever approach you take, it’s important also to recognise that with greater awareness of your values, they may also begin to shift and change.

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So too can your actions and whether they are in alignment with your values or not. Retirement is a chapter that affords individuals to launch into living a life that feels more aligned with who they truly are and how they want to show up in the world.

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You could call this process of aligning your values with your actions as life design, but that’s just a reference term. The degree to which you do this can be quite broad, from simply becoming more aware of your values and just remembering them at key choice points, maybe by asking yourself the question, is this moving me towards what matters most to me right now?

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Checking in at key choice points really is the backbone of becoming more conscious and intentional in how you move through the world. You can also do this differently in terms of planning and strategising.

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Now, this may not be everyone’s cup of tea, but some people really do love this and it can be highly effective. This revolves more around goal setting, picking values that most inspire or excite you and then beginning to sketch some actionable goals.

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These can be long term goals that are broken into shorter steps, following the simple smart principle, making sure that whatever goal you set is specific, measurable, it’s action based, it’s realistic and also time based.

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Irrespective of the level of investment of time and energy, the key to success with life design is an attitude of experimentation and curiosity. It hinges on being open to trying new things and exploring different paths.

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Life design as such is an iterative process, so it involves learning from your past experiences and making adjustments along the way, embracing failure as an opportunity for growth and a adapting your plans accordingly.

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So the invitation really is allowing this to be a process of continual learning and discovery. Lastly, but certainly not least, we’re just going to take a look at social connection and relational dynamics.

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In recent decades, research is clearly showing that social connection is not just a pleasant aspect of life, but in fact a fundamental pillar of our wellbeing. Mountain studies reveal that strong social connections contribute to increased longevity, improved mental health, enhanced cognition and a reduced risk of chronic diseases.

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A landmark study conducted back in 2010 by Holt and Lundstad found that having strong social relationships was associated with a 50% increased likelihood of longevity. This is reaffirmed by the work of Dan Butner.

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With his research and exploration of blue zones, these are regions around the world where people live longer, healthier lives compared to the global average, a significantly amount longer, as they have the highest number of centenarians per capita.

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Butner’s research indicates that strong social connection is a central component of these healthy communities. Strong social support systems, quality interactions, intergenerational mingling and an overall sense of belonging among residents, is the common thread.

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In blue zones, social connection is deeply ingrained in their daily life. Spending time with family, friends, neighbours is a priority. Regular social gatherings, community events and shared meals are commonplace.

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This can be a world apart from what many people experience in the typical busy working world of Western society, where high interaction is often business-related and leisurely social connection only tends to happen in short windows throughout a week.

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However, in retirement, this all changes. As you’re already very well aware, retirement brings with it these significant changes to routine and the opportunities for social interactions change dramatically.

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There can be on one hand reduced social outlets that can quickly spiral down into feelings of loneliness and isolation, and during the transition some retirees may even withdraw from social interactions unintentionally isolating themselves.

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Others may underestimate the impact of loneliness on their physical and mental wellbeing, so it’s important to just have awareness and notice these tendencies in their early stages. On the other hand, the good news is that there is countless highly effective ways to enhance social connection in this next phase of life.

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Firstly, actively seeking out social activities that align with your interests and passions is an obvious quick win. Exploring local clubs, volunteering for community projects, or taking part in group hobbies to connect with like-minded individuals, all are far more accessible in retirement than when you’re working.

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Technology can also facilitate this, so exploring platforms like Meetup, for example, can really open your eyes to what might be available in your community, and you just might be surprised by what you find.

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And if you can’t find what you’re looking for, then maybe it’s an opportunity to be bold and brave and start your own group or gathering. Of course, retirement in Ireland also comes with the added bonus of free transport with a travel companion for any listeners who are based in Ireland.

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So in this way, retirement grants the gift of being able to be more selective about our social circles and engagements. You have much more control to determine who you surround yourself with and can choose to be with people who bring positivity, support, and shared values into your life.

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You can seek out communities, organizations, and groups that really align with what matters most to you as we touched on in the previous segment. This is a quick and powerful way to elicit a sense of belonging and all the good stuff that comes with that, like safety, trust, and most importantly, enjoyment.

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It’s also worth bearing in mind that there are some former colleagues that you might like to stay connected with after you retire. It might feel strange connecting out of work if all your connection prior to this was just in your roles, but again it’s a lovely opportunity to see how relationships can evolve.

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It’s also important not to be offended if some work connections fade. This can be largely due to practicalities and time availability as opposed to not wanting to maintain the connection. Preserving some of your work relationships can serve as a nice way to gradually taper away from the workplace rather than all connection coming to an abrupt end.

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Remember the extra available time in retirement also offers you the opportunity to reconnect with old friends. This can be a powerful way to revisit old memories and remember dormant parts of yourself, depending of course on how far back the relationship spans.

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It can be very therapeutic and also really enjoyable to re-establish old bonds, so don’t be afraid to be the first one to reach out and get the ball rolling. With regard to relational dynamics when it comes to the primary family unit, things can be a little bit more challenging.

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It’s not unusual to notice family relationships evolve during the retirement transition, particularly between partners who may be confronted by spending much more time with one another than ever before, but also for any parents.

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If the dynamic with their children change as they are now grown adults, then you might find that you want to be more involved in their lives now that you’ve more time available, but this might be more than they’re typically accustomed to while you are working all their lives.

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And so the well-intentioned desire to see more of them may not be received as expected or desired. There may also be requests to assist with child care of grandchildren, so it’s important to be aware of your own personal capacities and preferences and to be able to express these needs to your children without feeling the pressure to support them on the basis you believe that you should or you need to or you have to because it’s what you’ve been told is normal or the right thing to do.

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So the same fundamental principles of healthy relationships apply in all of these circumstances. Firstly, becoming more aware of your needs, as well as then respecting and acknowledging the needs of the others and negotiating a path to getting them met.

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Being aware and responsible for your own personal triggers and cultivating compassion and empathy when confronted by another’s trigger really is the key to relational freedom. Now if this is totally new to you or you’ve found that in the past maybe you’ve encountered recurring themes of conflict or challenges in core relationships, it may be beneficial to learn more about communication skills, such as the Nonviolent Communication Framework.

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So who would have thought that developing communication skills could be a key part of your retirement plan? And yet, if you do invest in explore this further, it may radically enhance your retirement process.

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The key takeaway here is really just to truly thrive, finding that balance between autonomy and interconnectivity. And as we lose one tribe through our workplace, how can we seek out another that supports us and that we can contribute to as we grow into old age?

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So this has just been a whirlwind tour of some important considerations to factor when preparing for this major life transition. As already mentioned, we do have a masterclass that will dive much deeper into this.

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And if you are not on the app, maybe just simply taking away a few of these snippets and if anything resonated with you, doing some further exploration yourself to support you having a healthier, happier retirement journey.

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As always, thank you so much for your time and attention and wishing you every health and happiness into the future.